Wednesday, September 05, 2007

 

Recant

So, our little Bird is now four weeks old. I marvel at how fluid that amount of time has been - sometimes it feels like she's been here so much longer and other times, it's so fresh and new. She continues to surprise us each day. Like yesterday, she started to cry distinctly and I think I figured out that one of the cries is that she's hungry (it's more mellow and whiney) while another cry is to tell us she's dealing with a nasty burp (that cry is angry and hurt). Today, she's in the mood to hold her head up and check things out. It's neato.

What I feel compelled to post below is something that I believe many of my friends and family have been curious about. So, does tfoxfan have to recant any of her former statements of parenting? The answer is yes. Let me be clear, it's not all of the statements I made that I must recall, rather these few that I have identified over the recent days and weeks.

1. "Why do we always have to wait around for 'them' to be ready to see us? We're always accomodating their nap scheduling or feeding schedule."

This one was quite obviously insensitive of me. I get annoyed now at the thought of someone dropping in and I may not be completely together and Birdie may have a fit because of food needs and so, I get the struggle to schedule hang time with others.

2. "Why do parents often wear unlaundered clothes? Don't they have any dignity left to just change their pants and look decent?"

I do struggle with admitting this one, but I must say that I get it now. I happen to have a baby that regularly pukes up milk versions - liquid, curd, what have you. I have soiled clothes on me which I make attempts to clean and yet, we all know, people can see it. And, I understand now that doing laundry isn't the easiest task to accomplish with a babe in arms.

3. "Why are parents unable to carry a conversation with other adults while their children are present?"

I must distinguish that this is more about being able to multi-task versus ignoring the current conversation a parent is in with another adult to rather talk with their child. I do understand the difficulty of carrying on a conversation while the babe is crying. I can't do both at the same time. I never expected to, but I get the challenge of it now. I may get better at this though, right?

Well, you only get three recants for now, there's likely more out there. Most importantly, I want to apologize to those of you that know the look I gave that screamed these statements prior to my newly minted parenthood. I just really didn't get it. And now - when I catch myself in these little parental nuances, I laugh and think, "Ah... this is what that is.".

Comments:
Oh Esther, you're so self aware and open to learning that I'm inspired. Kudos. Most of us try to hide our previous misconceptions or pretend our attitudes were never different than they are now. It takes such a confident person to make statements like this.
 
How I enjoy each blog you write! Each one written with much thought put behind it.

Being a parent is a 24/7 job. Nothing compares to the job of a parent. I love how you describe some of your answers to the questions. The one I love the most, was the 2nd one... unlaundered clothes. I just had to laugh. I just remember how it was for me. I may have gotten the laundry done, but folded and put away, well.... that was a privilege, if I had the time. The throwing up, that just comes with being a parent of a small one. It's funny though... it becomes the norm. No one who is a parent of a small child even notices. They just laugh internally and say, her too huh? The smell, well that just becomes the new perfume of parenting.

Love, Oma
 
I never understood the phrase 'your life will change when you have kids'. Until now. My mind is also being blown open. I notice it when I'm not too tired...(still no sleeping through the night here - chucks!). Sophie
 
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